How do women feel when they are in love?
07.06.2025 15:09
3. I wanted to dress up, look good in front of him. Now, there was a catch in this, as I never cared about this stuff. Even cleaning ladies would look better than me. So, I felt super, super shy whenever I dressed up and couldn’t gather the courage to go in front of him.
8. Then I grew up more, matured a bit, and some serious things happened in life, etc. I feel like that was the time I was deep in love. When my love became selfless. When all that mattered was that he should be happy. When I would break at the sight of him being sad. There also came jealousy, as jealousy made me realize just how serious I was, and that I would actually want him to be happy, no matter if I can’t have him.
When I realized I had fallen hard; it wasn’t just admiration, I think this was like the first or second year of a long journey. I went through a lot of stages after that. Let me number those stages, or I’ll keep writing on forever.
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9. That’s embarrassing, but I started to cry for him. More like, ‘sitting near the pond under the starry sky, shedding tears’ (eeh). It made sense to me why princesses would sing when they were sad. Once, when I saw his interest in a really pretty friend of mine (I loved her a lot), and his constant interest in her, I couldn’t express how I felt. It was a strange mixture of emotions. So, I just lied there in bed, ‘shedding tears’ and singing. Whatever I felt, it was so soothing to put it in a song.
12. So, I tried hard to let him go. It was a long journey of six years. Thank God I didn’t search for: how to know if a guy realized he likes you when you stop liking him (ahem). Like, I seriously pulled back. My friends would make fun of me, as they know just how many times I went back to totally falling for him all over again. The sixth year was all like that. But then I accepted my feelings that I like him, and he doesn’t, so we can do nothing about that. So, let me just like him.
For a quick answer, A woman in love pours her love, expresses it in a motherly form of love.
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2. Then, I focused on how I felt around him. I couldn’t look him in the eye for more than five seconds. People may laugh, but I had a rush of blushing, and his face started to look so handsome—his hair, his eyes, his smile. I usually didn't look at him, just caught glimpses. So, to have a good look felt like a reward. You might think he’d be really handsome, but as I grew older, in experience and in love, I realized that he looked super handsome to probably just me. To others, he was one of the most random guys.
13. One thing I forgot to mention was the daydreaming part. Literally all the time. I would fight off sleep to imagine me and him lost in a jungle, and me giving him first aid. Whenever I had to talk to him or go to ask him for something, I would spend hours before imagining every possible scenario, every possible reaction of his, and how I’d react. All the time. When I went to a nice place, I’d imagine having him walk along with me. I would replay and replay our memories again and again.
1. First, I started googling like mad: the difference between loving and liking someone; how do you know you’re in love; the difference between a crush, love, liking, obsession, admiration, affection; how does falling in love feel, etc. This was the most initial stage, and I won’t even call it love at that point. All the time I had a phone, I used it to search for this stuff.
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16. I know I was in ‘love’ with the guy I talked about here. This is because I just felt closer to him as I gradually got to know his flaws. Some of his flaws I would never accept in my potential partner, but I considered them if it was him. I didn’t have any expectations from him. I liked him when he had pimples all over, when he got sunburned. When he didn’t grow as tall as other guys. When he hurt me or my family, I would forgive him (because I knew he didn’t mean to. He just liked teasing and sometimes went above his limits without realizing). I didn’t mind when he smelled bad. The things I did mind, I owned them. Like, it was a soft feeling of getting mad and wanting him to correct his behavior, or it would harm him etc.
11. Then, OBVIOUSLY, I started searching: how to know if a guy likes you as a friend only; how to know if my crush doesn’t like me back; how to know if he likes someone else; how to know if he only sees me as a little girl, etc. I searched but tried hard to turn a blind eye to his relationship with her.
I wrote this entire essay purely for people who are interested in real life experiences, or you could just dodge over the first two lines of every point.
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15. And that’s that, till I met someone else. I didn’t ‘love’ the new one, but developed a fair crush on him, which helped a lot in getting over him.
14. But the thing is, now I didn’t expect anything back from him. I didn’t search the internet. I didn’t feel jealous (just a bit of longing, like someone else has my precious thing). I didn’t look for him (though if I didn’t see him for more than a week, I would miss him like heck), etc.
10. Then came the actual jealousy phase. I stopped going to gatherings where she would be. Whenever I saw them, I saw him talking respectfully to her, smiling, helping her with stuff. It was a bad time, yeah. It actually felt like someone was scratching my heart with a pointed rock. Piercing pain. You, reader, might not get it, as words can’t express the depth, but I’m not exaggerating. If I were, I wouldn’t have called it ‘love’. It was worse, because all the ‘signs’ I read on the internet about a guy liking a girl were fitting _for his actions toward her_. He would still tease me, but I wouldn’t be that excited.
Until once, I saw him come into a room where my friend and I were sitting. Randomly. My image of him was that he never, never would just want to ‘see’ a girl (he was a cool and chill dude). And it probably wasn’t me he was there for. He never did that for me. I tried to confirm, so I went away to the other room. And they both stayed there, slowly started to chat about soft stuff. He smiled, and she laughed. There was this cute baby of some random woman in my friend’s lap. They both cuddled with him, like parents. Like a newlywed couple. This was like a drama scene; you can literally imagine me standing outside the door, looking down as I hear the chatter.
6. There was this weird thing. I started behaving myself, not speaking loudly in front of him, trying my best not to be annoying. I got so conscious that other people would say I went into the background. BUT strangely, whenever I talked to him, my voice became high-pitched. I talked loudly even when it was quiet around. I still don’t know why, but the internet says this happens to girls.
7. Then came the phase of asking the internet: signs a guy likes you; signs a guy likes you but is shy; signs a guy likes you but is hiding it; what is the body language of a guy who likes a girl; signs someone is secretly in love with you. And obviously, the zodiacs and MBTI. I searched for hours (no, I didn’t have a lot of free time) about how ‘compatible’ my MBTI and zodiac were with his. This process was fun, but it never helped :(
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4. My heart would beat hard constantly whenever he was around. Whenever. My eyes looked around for him, my ears searched to catch his voice. And when I did, I used to stay still in my position, holding my breath for a good 15 seconds. It was always a reward, a surprise to have him around.
I loved that friend of mine, and I loved him. I would... want the best for her and for him. Before, I prayed so hard for her to fall for someone else so I wouldn’t have to go through this. There was this rush of emotions before I suddenly felt like the turmoil in me calmed down. I gave it a lot of thought, for days, weeks. And I decided that I’d back off respectfully. It wasn’t because my feelings were weak. It was because I thought, what would I want: him being with me and not being happy, or him being with her with both of them being happy? I can’t force someone I love. And I know that she, my friend, is a fine woman for him. She’ll love him well, so he gets a loving woman who’s better looking and soft-spoken than me. It’s better for him. (Although now I know that she’s just as flawed as me).
5. I started to enjoy his teasing. He didn’t talk to me other than joking around. This teasing wasn’t in a bad sense; he just liked to tease everyone around. I started to love it, as this was the only time he’d at least talk to me, smile at me, laugh because of me (eee). Before that, I used to fight back with my mood spoiled; now, I still fought back but tried to suppress my energy.
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I still looked at his face, and the background behind him disappeared. I still saw him smile, and my heart skipped beats. His face was still the most calming face in the world. The most healing one, the most handsome of all guys.